Some decisions are definitely better made when you are well rested and have a better chance that your thought process is in working order.
I have been known to do some crazy shit when I’ve been tired, bet you have too.
These are the mistakes we commonly make.
1. That it would be great to get away from it all, so go online and book a hotel stay with the kids. Stupidly thinking this will leave you refreshed. My friends, this is not the answer! Now, not only are you tired, but you have to pack and plan for a weekend away for the whole family. Because you know damn sure that hubs will not contribute to the preparation. Also you know your kids are going to be in the same room as you, right? Hyped up on all those sugary drinks and snacks you’ve given them to keep them quiet while you visited all those great places and ate in those nice cafès.
They won’t go to sleep for ages and you will have to watch normal tv in the hotel bedroom at a volume of 3 or less. Not being able to flush the toilet for fear of waking them. And at 9pm you will find both you and hubs perched on the bath swigging from a bottle of warm prosecco having a giggle so as not to disturb the little ones and wondering who on earth thought this was a good idea. We won’t bother to talk about the poor quality sleep you’ll get – that’s a given!!
2. Organise a kids birthday party at home instead of paying to book out a softplay. ‘It’ll be cheaper/more fun to have it at home.’ thinks dozy eyed mum one Monday morning. Just no. You will spend hours trawling Pinterest for the most ‘out there’ theme. Determined to have quirky party bags that no one will be interested in. You will have demented kids running around your home, tripping of Haribo madness.
Having spent hours cleaning the house, some small brat will still wander through to the collective parents in the kitchen with a pair of dirty pants he found behind a cushion, and you will wonder why you bothered cleaning at all when 6 boys pee in your bathroom in every available area – other than the toilet. For weeks after you will find crumbs and remenants of balloons in the most bizarre places and by the end of the planning you will will have thought of a million excuses to cancel.
3. Arranging to see those friends you haven’t caught up with in forever. Ok. I’m just going to put it out there that there are some people it’s easier to be friends with over the medium of social media. You are fooled into believing you have heaps in common when in reality you either don’t know each other well enough, or know far too much! In your yawn induced state you make outlandish plans that keep getting cancelled due to kids sickness/your sickness/lack of funds/lack of remembering when you have actually made plans/work/other.
When you finally do meet up you spend an inordinate amount of time getting ready so as not to show off how tired you actually are. Slapping on make up to hide the fact that you haven’t seen daylight this year, and throwing on a top that was in style (maybe) in 2002. You dig out jeans that you never wear and only when out the door realise that they dig into your love handles and at the same time ride down showing off a sizeable portion of bum crack. Breezily making small talk about what you’ve been up to – when this infact amounts to nothing more than the commute to work and back each day, peppered with your head being stuck in the washing machine or the freezer scavenging for sustainable meals- is exhausting in itself. From your frequent online chats you know what each other has actually been up to, but smile pleasantly when they make up utter bullshit about ‘fun’ trips to the beach last weekend (you know from the million ranty whatsapps, that it had actually ended up in the kids spewing on the way there, one having a tantrm for the entire trip and the journey home nearly resulting in divorce because Dave said Jenny from his office had a new hairstyle and she might look good with something a bit more modern) But you have just talked the same tripe, so just smile along and slup your tea. Counting down every minute until you can reasonably leave, already thinking about what else you need to do today.
4. Catching up with family (see 3 above but with less preparation).
5. Evaluate your career prospects. Most Monday mornings, I used to sit and wonder why I didn’t have a fantastic job that gives me everything I need. I’d look at job adverts and think about what I’d love to be doing, I’d check out Uni courses and dream about a future where I had a fantastic job and a perfect work/life balance. I still look at others and see a better way of life.
But when you’re tired it makes it all the more depressing. The perfect job doesn’t exist. When I’m at my most tired I don’t want to be working at all! I just want the cash to keep coming in but for me to stay at home – with a cleaner, and a nanny … ok so I want a millionaire lifestyle! Daydreaming like this is crazy dangerous.
7. Decide to cook lots of healthy home cooked meals. Every sodding week. I want the kids to have nutritious food so I will stand chopping veg and cooking while dozing off – how I’ve never lost a finger I don’t know! Once these meals are in front of the kids, the majority of it is either left, pushed around the plate or thrown on the floor, no matter how much you coerce and/or threaten. You wish you had spent your afternoon curled up on the couch with the kids watching cartoons instead and had just turned to Captain Birdseye to cook dinner in 20min. You won’t be doing that again …until next week!
So my advice is to carry on! We will never learn. And trying to remember what not to do when you are tired is like trying to teach a toddler to use a fok – it can be done but takes a lot of concentration, many failures and so much mess you sometimes wonder if it would be easier moving than cleaning up the mess!
What are the craziest things you’ve done whilst tired and bored?